Saturday, February 18, 2012

Work in Play's Clothing

Hi!! Long time no see!!

That awkward moment when... you accidentally fell asleep and you don't know what time it is.

It's six in the morning, and I woke up at five. No baths, toothbrush or change of clothes (I was in a blue dress! Sleeping beauty? :))  This is probably the longest sleep I ever had in weeks after my thesis deadline.

And I was just so tired and happy yesterday.

In the morning, I went to UST to share my ongoing thesis for the Phil League of Sociology Students congress. I have presented papers before, and usually I don't prepare a script or anything. My presentation is almost empty and full of just keywords and pictures (mnemonics?) because I hate cluttered presentations.

When I first arrived, I was scared of how the first speaker was a little grilled with questions. I never had to answer a lot of questions before --it felt like a thesis defense. It was also that morning that I learned I was the second speaker and good thing I arrived on time.

When my turn came, I try not to shake too much and I prayed that things will be all right. It WASN'T all right at all. It was BETTER than what I expected :D

For some reason, I am really passionate about my thesis. This is so rare. Throughout my college life, every semester has a theme, such as Journalism or Feminism or Gender relations. It's very rare to stick with the topic if you are completely unfamiliar with it.

It was only last semester that I ever entered prisons or ever learned about jails. I had a lot of preconceived notions about it. Of course I was scared. But that experience gave birth to a realization, a sympathy, that we are all sinners, and these are just sinners who are branded by society. How else should the holy God judge us?

And so the next sem, my thesis semester, I decided to embark on a journey to discover rehabilitation inside the prisons. Yesterday as I share this, I couldn't help feeling THANKFUL because the reactors gave me positive feedback, and also my blockmates. Theses are individual projects and so I have been working alone, and to actually share it to people--the world of prisons--and finally get feedback is really rewarding. They found it good that I studied provincial jails and because of the descriptive quality. I can hardly attribute all the praises to myself. I was really just a writer of something that has already been existing. You could say a painter of a portrait of a certain person: it already is there, but you have never seen it that way before.

This is all God's work, and the praises also go to the detainees themselves. I never would have thought I'd enjoy my thesis this much.


We have new packaging back at Flaired! And a new contest too!

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My partners afterwards came to our house for us to pack the hair and have some mini-shoot. Again, it was a three-man photoshoot. We do our own make-up, style our own hair, model our own hair, take our own photos, edit our own photos. Multi-taskers indeed!

Thursday, February 9, 2012


I'm sorry, too much emphasis. But really, that is EXACTLY how I feel. So stressed that being stressed is an understatement.

I'm just about to go nuts finishing all my requirements this "Love" month. An example? Well I

  • get sick every Tuesday
  • Forget the most important details in my to-do list (like I ask the photocopy woman to save a copy for me and then I completely forget to return when I just fetched my wallet)
  • I do things haphazardly (missing and mixing)
  • When I think about the future all I feel is a great deal of anxiety!
  • I can't even decide what to do on certain days because there are way too many things to do
  • I don't even bother telling people I'm stressed because I could end up saying it like a new catchphrase
  • Something embarrassing. I drool when I sleep when I'm the most peaceful person to sleep (really)
Sigh. Difficult times. I just wanted to slow down. As much as wanting to possess that quality of being able to handle stress well, I think I have come to face the fact that I'm almost at the point of exhaustion.

I thank God that there are people who care for me. Like after I woke up tonight (at 12:30 AM) both my parents asked if I was okay. I'm not the type who runs to their arms crying saying she's tired, although I would welcome the idea. My friends whom I always know are 100% there during these kinds of moments (sigh! Praises) and of course the God of comfort whom I can always call to. It just feels better knowing that there are people who can understand it when you say you're not okay.

I tend to be harder on myself than anyone else, and to find shoulders to lean on and arms to cling to.... it's just the best thing. Thank you, Lord.